Sunday, January 24, 2010
i feel like the stay-puft marshmallow girl. i am so sick of my puffy steroid face. i'm so ugly and disgusting. i've always been chubby, but at least before it was all in my butt. now it's all on my face. it's so gross. i hate it so much. this must be some kind of karmic revenge for all my not-nice thoughts about other big girls, like i felt better than them because i was under 200 lbs and had a pretty face. now i'm as big as all the girls i'd look down on. and i look like a freaking puffer fish.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
anyway, yes, i had 3 bad tummy days last week. the day after my doc visit (just like taking a car to the shop -- starts making the noise again AFTER the mechanic says they found nothing wrong), thursday, and part of saturday and sunday. and today kinda. but today was bad in a different way. those were D days, today was a B day. I don't like B days. B days make me think i need to reup on steroids, and i hate those things. i'm so disgusting. i'm a big bloated mess. i feel like a freaking whale, but i really hate hate hate dieting. can't they invent something that makes you waste away the way prednisone makes you bloat up? it seems so unfair. i kinda wish i could go back to last may, with all the bleeding and sickness at least i was skinnier. back then before i was all depleted and useless, and just had UC. why do i feel sicker after all this medical intervention?
What diseases will make a patient eligible to get medical marijuana?
Cancer, glaucoma, seizure disorders (including epilepsy), Lou Gehrig’s disease, multiple sclerosis, muscular dystrophy, severe muscle spasms, HIV/AIDS, inflammatory bowel disease (including Crohn’s disease), any terminal illness if a doctor has determined the patient will die within a year, or any other medical condition or treatment that is approved by the state health department.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Monday, January 11, 2010
it just sucks that even when i try to take it easy, i still end up tired. and being tired just makes everything that much harder. which makes me cranky. i need a nap!
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
just got done filing away all my adp fsa claim forms for 2009, just in time to start my forms for 2010! adp hates trees -- there are so many forms! and i can't send them via email, i have to print them out and fax them over. how silly! i love when they request receipts though -- pretty much, only my walgreens charges go through without them asking for a substantiation form. but every doctor's office and hospital visit needs a form. like what the heck else am i purchasing at "Somerset Medical Center" for $250 except my hospital deductible? or "Mount Sinai Hospital" for $20? at least it's easy for me to fill out the form online, print it, and walk over to our fax machine to send it out. how do folks without laid back office jobs do it? kinkos? well, at least ADP will be able to keep people in jobs, what with all the paper coming in. it's more likely just faxing over to a robot or OCR scanner, but i'd like to imagine that there are humans involved somewhere. otherwise, it's just computers making more work for other computers.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
i just wish there were something i could take to make the spasms stop, but not knock me all the way out like prescription painkillers do. i took some tylenol, but i don't expect it to do anything. the tylenol was for the headache i woke up with. so far, all it's done is chase the headache from the left side of my head to the right side of my head.
it's frustrating, the ups and downs, but at least it was quiet yesterday and i was able to make it down for my bro in law's birthday dinner.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
now that i'm weaning off prednisone i don't have crazy munchies. I'm also not eating garbage anymore(no more fast food). i had an ensure shake, 2 kelloggs protein bars, a microwave can of chicken noodle soup, and some granola bars. still high calorie, but also high protein to hopefully stave off hunger. also a bit more nutritious than what i've been eating before. plus, by keeping my blood sugar steady, it should be easier for me to lose weight again.
at night, we met up for my brother in law's birthday dinner. it was fun being with hubs' family, and the food was delicious! i did go a bit overboard at dinner, but it was goood. italian wedding soup that was loaded with veggies, shrimp and angel hair pasta with a bold plum tomato and garlic sauce, a little calamari, and a chocolate lava cake mmmmm. so the cake was naughty, but it was soo good. and i won't have dessert again for the rest of the week. baby steps and moderation, even moderation.
Monday, January 4, 2010
doc visit went really well. i admit, i'm feeling much better than i did in nov/dec. fake remission has its benefits. but the side effects of the pred are wearing me out -- i'm so fat and puffy, my cheeks are all puffed up and red. the flushing sucks and the night sweats are annoying. luckily, the insomnia is much less, but i think that's because i got completely sleep-deprived and just cannot physically stay awake. but we're going to continue tapering off while we wait for the 6mp to work. he was cautiously optimistic that i might be able to avoid surgery. this was great news! i was so resigned to it, and totally expected this visit to be all about setting up dates with surgeons, but instead it's just back to wait and see. yeah, it's annoying and i'm impatient, but as long as my symptoms are mostly under control (which they are atm) and i don't deteriorate, i might actually not need surgery right away. woo hoo! plus, even if the 6mp doesn't work, and i do end up needing surgery, a few more months of waiting will help me be healthier for surgery, so recovery would be easier. so i go back in about a month to make sure i'm still on track. so i'm gonna try to not fixate on UC this month. which will be easier now that my symptoms are mostly under control. yay!
then we went to lunch at one fish two fish, right across the street from mt. sinai. omg, it was so good. the seafood bisque was so delicious and warm, it was a great day for soup. i had crab legs and a lobster and red velvet cake... mmmmmm. hubs got fried catfish and pecan pie -- i helped him with the pie. since the appointment took so long, we decided to skip any other nyc activities and just headed home. we escaped nyc ahead of rush hour and i fell asleep on the drive home.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
also, added a cornify button to the site. i have it in my browser so if i need instant happiness on any page, i can summon rainbows and unicorns. sparkly happiness is just a click away!
Saturday, January 2, 2010
omg, totally yarn splurge. and got to see the babies at the farm. today was a gorgeous day - everything just went smoothly.
hubs brought me delicious breakfast yummmmmm
dropped off my car for service at the mechanic.
went to the mall to have my glasses adjusted - turned out they were totally busted and i needed new frames. they happened to have them in stock, for $40. cheap! i was in and out in less than 30 minutes.
spent time with the crias and got lovely yarn
lunch was delicious. had a weird craving for shecrab soup, and the diner just happened to have seafood bisque! it was goood.
did a little errands/shopping - even walmart and it wasn't horrible!
expected to pay between $700-$1000 for car repairs, was about $200. and was ready as soon as we were done with errands.
i'm so used to swimming upstream, it's awesome to just go with the flow.
perhaps llamas are good lluck?
Friday, January 1, 2010
I've transformed from a 30 yr old woman, to a 90 yr old lady, to a 5 yr old cat. i wake up, eat, go to sleep, repeat. today i went to take a short nap and didn't wake up until 4 pm. it was a good day for it though - i had no plans. and my colon and i were sleeping at the same time, which is nice. usually, when i try to sleep at night, she wants to stay up. so when we're on the same page, it's good to catch up on the beauty sleep. besides, now i'll be well-rested for the rest of the weekend -- a trip to the llama farm tomorrow, followed by a video game playing marathon, the football sunday and a drive up to see a movie with my mom and sis. monday, a trip to nyc. yeah, good thing i stocked up on sleep today.