boredom

it's been a weird 3 months. when I first saw dr I., i was convinced we'd be doing surgery by now. but the 6mp and colazal seem to be working, and I'm almost off the steroids. of course, this is great! but by not being so dramatically, obviously ill, it makes the trip into nyc once a month to see him seem kinda silly. it's going to take me 2 hours each way to get there, sometimes he runs late and i hang out in the waiting room for an hour or so, and the rest of my day is shot because the appointment is always in the middle of the day (not like i'd be able to get back to central NJ to work anyway). The last couple of trips were in december, january, and february, so maybe March will be warm enough to make a fun day out of being in nyc. but i'm so incredibly tired, all i want to do is sleep, or sit still and knit. i love nyc, but it's not a good place to be when you are too tired to walk anywhere. plus, mt sinai is way the hell uptown, so by the time i get myself back downtown, i'm ready to go to penn and jump on a train.

meh, i'm spoiled because my original doc is like 15 minutes from my house. if we had ignored the low tmpt enzymes and just tried 6mp last year instead of remicade, last year might not have sucked so hard, and I wouldn't have been on steroids for the last 6 months. and i wouldn't feel like a pufferfish. hindsight is 20/20 i spose. few more weeks, the steroids will be over, and my excuse for not being a good diabetic will be gone. back to blood glucose monitoring, watching carbs, and exercising. the snow is melting, the sun is out, and it's time for me to shed all this blubber. i don't mind having a giant behind, i just want to get it off my face.