so so tired

i am so exhausted. i'm trying to take it easy, but there is so much to do. i'll prob go home early today, which sucks, because i'm trying to hang on to my sicktime, but this is ridiculous. i feel like i haven't slept in days.

uc symptoms have definitely improved, a little setback today, but no spazzies. i'm just so incredibly tired. probably because i'm not really eating that great. but now i have food, and i just have to make myself cook it and eat it. that'll help me feel better. the pred is prob causing crazy blood sugar, which is making me feel crappy. i have to push and eat better and not just froot loops because it's easy. i need protein dammit :)

but omg, the back pain spasms. i got in the car this morning, and thought my spine was trying to escape. it's hit a few times since i got here. no pain, then searing omgkillmenow pain for a good few seconds. here's hoping tylenol helps. i'm guessing it's just part of pms fun, since everything likes to happen together. maybe that's part of why i am soo tired.

it's physical and mental too, so I need to just go home and check out for a few hours. if it were just physical, i could lay down and get mental stuff done. if it were just mental, i would just be my silly goofball self and have a little trouble with the problem solving today. but no, it's both, and if i fight it, it'll probably just continue into tomorrow.

i've got bloodwork scheduled for tomorrow, so if there's any funny business going on in my bloodstream, we'll catch it. but right now i think it's just poor diet and the fact that my body is trying to rebuild 18 inches of intestine now that the TNF is smacked down by the Remicade. Like road work -- it's finally not raining so maybe these long-needed repairs can get done. but in the meantime, it's gonna make it hard to get anywhere.